More About Alcholism

Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics are not going to believe they are in that class. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing inability to control his drinking can do the right- about-face and drink like a gentleman, our hats are off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough and long enough to drink like other people!

Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums - we could increase the list ad infinitum.

We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself. Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition. “The key words here are (if you are honest with yourself). We must always remain honest with ourselves and true to our hearts if we are to succeed”.

Important Days of A.A.

Dear Friends:

It is with great sadness that we share the news
that Nell Wing died on Wednesday, February 14,
2007 at 7:00 p.m. after a lengthy illness. Nell
was 89 years old.

As most of you know, Nell was Bill W.’s secretary
and assistant for 17 years and a close friend
and long-time companion to Lois W. She worked
at the General Service Office of A.A. from the
beginning of 1947 until her retirement at the
close of 1982, starting as a receptionist and
later becoming secretary of A.A. World Services,
Inc. Additionally, she served as G.S.O.’s first
archivist for the last ten of her years at the
office. The Archives opened in 1975.

We would like to take a moment to celebrate
Nell’s life and share the following:

From Markings, November/December 1983, when
Nell announced her retirement in print:
“…I hope to stay nearby; and never lessen
interest in this fellowship, nor loosen the
close bonds of friendship with my A.A. and
Al-Anon friends. I’m forever grateful for this
marvelous experience that began for me on
March 3, 1947, at 415 Lexington Ave., New York
City, in 3 small rooms of the Central Terminal
Building. I have enjoyed and treasured every
moment of it. I won’t say `goodbye:’ just want
to extend my love and thanks to each one of
you dear friends.”

Please join all of us at the General Service
Office in extending our heartfelt condolences
to Nell’s family.

Thank you,

Amy Filiatreau
Archivist
AA World Services, Inc.

Important Days Of A.A

DR. NORRIS’ TALK at the MEMORIAL SERVICES held for BILL Wilson
in New York City on February 14, 1971

Our beloved Bill is dead. Even as I stand before you and say the
words, I cannot really believe that it is true. In my heart I choose
to believe that Bill is here with us at this very moment. And I
somehow can almost hear him saying in that half-amused, half
embarrassed way of his, “Oh come on now Jack, do you really think all
this fuss is necessary?”

Two weeks ago, at a meeting of your Board of Trustees, shortly after
Bill’s passing, there was a rather lively discussion about a matter
involving the whole fellowship. When it had reached a certain level
of intensity, I found myself waiting to hear Bill speak up, as he so
often did and say those few words that would put everything in
perspective. But he didn’t speak. And it was then that I realized way
down deep that we would never hear his voice again…that we could no
longer count on the constant presence of his wisdom and strength. We
could never again say as we had said so many times before, “Bill,
what do you think?” And I at least, have not yet come to accept this
completely.

Bill was no saint. He was an alcoholic and a man of stubborn will and
purpose. How else could he have lived through the years of
frustration, failure, and discouragement while the steps, the
traditions, and the conference were being hammered out on the anvil
of hard experience with the first few groups? That he had the
self-honesty, the clarity of vision to see the vital necessity for
the Third Step, and turning one’s life and will over to a Higher
Power is just one part of our great good fortune that Bill lived. I
have seen Bill’s pride and I have seen his humility. And I have been
present when people from far countries have met him for the first
time and started to cry. And all Bill - that shy Vermonter - could do
was stand there and look like he wanted to run from the room. No,
Bill was no saint, although many of us wanted to make him into one.
Knowing this, he was insistent that legends about him be kept to a
minimum - that accurate records be kept so that future generations
would know him as a man. He was a very human person — to me an
exceptionally human person.

Bill’s constant concern during almost all of the years that I knew
him was that Alcoholics Anonymous should always be available for the
suffering alcoholic–that the mistakes that led to the fading of
previous movements to help alcoholics should be avoided. To me one
measure of his greatness is the clarity of his vision of the future
in his determination to let go of us long before we were willing to
let go of him.

Bill was a good sponsor, - the wise old timer determined to
relinquish the role of founder because he knew that A.A. must, as he
would say, come of age and take complete responsibility for itself.
He had an abiding faith that our Fellowship not only could, but
should run without him. Repeatedly, during the last few years, he has
said in General Service Conference sessions “We have nothing to
fear.” Bill believed that the wisdom of A.A. came out of church
basements and not from the pulpit; that it was directed from the
groups to the Trustees rather than the other way around. He sometimes
felt, though, when the Conference disagreed with him as it sometimes
did, that its conscience needed to be better informed, but it was
this way that we really shared experience and developed strength and
confidence that the answers would work out.

Bill knew that it was not one voice that should be heard, but many
thousands of voices. And it was his gift that he was able to listen
to them all, then, out of the noise and confusion discern the group
conscience. Then he would put it all together, the tension of
argument would fade, and everyone would realize that his answer was
right. What Bill’s death means to me now is, that all of us–all of
us: you, the delegates, the Trustees–will have to listen much more
carefully than we once did in order to make out the voice of the
group conscience.

And I know that this is possible. Bill has trained us for it
beginning in St. Louis in 1955. For this was Bill’s vision — to
create a channel of communication within the Fellowship of Alcoholics
Anonymous that would make it possible for everyone to be hear: from
the individual through the group, to the delegates and to the
Trustees, so that A.A. will always be here to extend a hand to the
drunk who is at this very moment crying out in the darkness of his
night as he reaches for help.

In closing, I want to say that it has been an honor for me to have
had this opportunity to participate with you in giving thanks to God
that Bill lived and was given the wisdom and strength and courage to
make the world a better place for all of us. There are many more
things I could say, but what can one say finally of a man’s goodness
and greatness? How many ways can you take his measure? I cannot do it
or say it for any of you — only for myself. He was the greatest and
wisest man I ever knew. Above everything, he was a man. And I believe
that he left his goodness and greatness and wisdom with us, for any
of us to take in what measure we can. May God grant us the wisdom and
strength to keep Alcoholics Anonymous alive, vital, attractive,
and unencumbered by the egocentricities that can so easily spoil it.

The Twelve Steps.

The Twelve Steps Of A.A.

Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

More About Alcoholism

More About Alcoholism

Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.

We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.

We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals - usually brief - were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.

We are like men who have lost their legs; they never grow new ones. Neither does there appear to be any kind of treatment which will make alcoholics of our kind like other men. We have tried every imaginable remedy. In some instances there has been brief recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse. Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree there is no such thing as making a normal drinker out of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this, but it hasn’t done so yet. “I personally do not think science will ever accomplish this and even if it did I would not take any pills to stop my alcoholism problems. Frankly, I love my meetings and the people in them. If I just took a pill or patch or whatever, than I would not go to meetings and seclude myself again”.

There Is A Solution

The distinguished American psychologist, William James, in his book” Varieties of Religious Experience, “indicates a multitude of ways in which men have discovered God. We have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by which faith can be acquired. If what we have learned and felt and seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try. Those having religious affiliations will find here nothing disturbing to their beliefs or ceremonies. There is no friction among us over such matters.

We think it no concern of ours what religious bodies our members identify themselves with as individuals. This should be an entirely personal affair which each one decides for himself in the light of past associations, or his present choice. Not all of us join religious bodies, but most of us favor such memberships.

In the following chapter, there appears an explanation of alcoholism, as we understand it, then a chapter addressed to the agnostic. Many who once were in this class are now among our members. Surprisingly enough, we find such convictions no great obstacle to a spiritual experience.

Further on, clear-cut directions are given showing how we recovered. These are followed by forty-three personal experiences. Each individual, in the personal stories, describes in his own language and from his own point of view the way he established his relationship with God. These give a fair cross section of our membership and a clear-cut idea of what has actually happened in their lives.

We hope no one will consider these self-revealing accounts in bad taste. Our hope is that many alcoholic men and women, desperately in need, will see these pages, and we believe that it is only by fully disclosing ourselves and our problems that they will be persuaded to say, “Yes, I am one of them too; I must have this thing.”

There Is A Solution

But this man still lives, and is a free man. He does not need a bodyguard nor is he confined. He can go anywhere on this earth where other free men may go without disaster, provided he remains willing to maintain a certain simple attitude. The doctor said: “You have the mind of a chronic alcoholic. I have never seen one single case recover, where that state of mind existed to the extent that it does in you.” Our friend felt as though the gates of hell had closed on him with a clang.

He said to the doctor, “Is there no exception?” “Yes,” replied the doctor, “there is. Exceptions to cases such as yours have been occurring since early times. Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of huge emotional displacements and rearrangements. Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them. In fact, I have been trying to produce some such emotional rearrangement within you. With many individuals the methods which I employed are successful, but I have never been successful with an alcoholic of your description.”

Upon hearing this, our friend was somewhat relieved, for he reflected that, after all, he was a good church member. This hope, however, was destroyed by the doctor’s telling him that while his religious convictions were very good, in his case they did not spell the necessary vital spiritual experience. Here was the terrible dilemma in which our friend found himself when he had the extraordinary experience, which as we have already told you, made him a free man.

We, in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, “a design for living “that really works.

There Is A Solution

The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God’s universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.

If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we believe there is no middle-of-the-road solution. We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort.

A certain American business man had ability, good sense, and high character. For years he had floundered from one sanitarium to another. He had consulted the best known American psychiatrists. Then he had gone to Europe, placing himself in the care of a celebrated physician (the psychiatrist, Dr. Jung) who prescribed for him. Though experience had made him skeptical, he finished his treatment with unusual confidence. His physical and mental condition were unusually good. Above all, he believed he had acquired such a profound knowledge of the inner workings of his mind and its hidden springs that relapse was unthinkable. Nevertheless, he was drunk in a short time. More baffling still, he could give himself no satisfactory explanation for his fall.

So he returned to this doctor, whom he admired, and asked him point-blank why he could not recover. He wished above all things to regain self-control. He seemed quite rational and well-balanced with respect to other problems. Yet he had no control whatever over alcohol. Why was this?

He begged the doctor to tell him the whole truth, and he got it. In the doctor’s judgment he was utterly hopeless; he could never regain his position in society and he would have to place himself under lock and key or hire a bodyguard if he expected to live long. That was a great physician’s opinion.

There Is A Solution

The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people. There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove.

The alcoholic may say to himself in the most casual way, “It won’t burn me this time, so here’s how!” Or perhaps he doesn’t think at all. How often have some of us begun to drink in this nonchalant way, and after the third or fourth, pounded on the bar and said to ourselves, “For God’s sake, how did I ever get started again?” Only to have that thought supplanted by “Well, I’ll stop with the sixth drink.” Or “What’s the use anyhow?”

When this sort of thinking is fully established in an individual with alcoholic tendencies, he has probably placed himself beyond human aid, and unless locked up, may die or go permanently insane. These stark and ugly facts have been confirmed by legions of alcoholics
throughout history. But for the grace of God, there would have been thousands more convincing demonstrations. So many want to stop but cannot.

There is a solution. Almost none of us liked the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet. We have found much of heaven and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.

There Is A Solution

Once in a while he may tell the truth. And the truth, strange to say, is usually that he has no more idea why he took that first drink than you have. Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied part of the time. But in their hearts they really do not know why they do it. Once this malady has a real hold, they are a baffled lot. There is the obsession that somehow, someday, they will beat the game. But they often suspect they are down for the count.

How true this is, few realize. In a vague way their families and friends sense that these drinkers are abnormal, but everybody hopefully awaits the day when the sufferer will rouse himself from his lethargy and assert his power of will.

The tragic truth is that if the man be a real alcoholic, the happy day may not arrive. He has lost control. At a certain point in the drinking of every alcoholic, he passes into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail. This tragic situation has already arrived in practically every case long before it is suspected.

The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink.